Tuesday, June 26, 2012

A Conversation That Apparently Happened

Broadway Producer 1: So, Fiddler on the Roof. That's Jewish, right?

Broadway Producer 2: Yeah, I think so.

Broadway Producer 1: So we'll make them speak with Brooklyn accents.

Broadway Producer 2: Can we mix the Brooklyn accents with Boston ones?

Broadway Producer 1: Why?

Broadway Producer 2: I don't have an answer to that question.

Broadway Producer 1: Perfect! Let's do it.

Dialogue Coach: Do you want me to work in some Slavic accents?

Broadway Producer 1: Whoa whoa whoa!

Broadway Producer 2: Hold up there. We freed those people. We can't call them that anymore.

Dialogue Coach: What? But...

Broadway Producer 1: I'm starving. Who wants lunch?

Broadway Producer 2: Pastrami on rye?

Broadway Producer 1: You know it! Who's buying?

(Dialogue Coach sighs, slumps shoulders)

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