Saturday, July 7, 2012

R.S.V.P.

Dear Sir (Or, if we are now close enough friends that I may return your greeting of "Dude!" in kind, Dude),

I regret to inform you that I will not be attending your party tonight, July 7th, at ten p.m. Instead, I shall be working, and therefore occupied. My co-workers will not be attending either, as, depite your request, I will probably not bother telling them about this party; and if the topic does come up, it will probably not be in an overly positive light. Rest assured that should I somehow get out of work before this time, I will also not be attending, as I am somewhat averse to gatherings of people I don't know advertised by men in tight t-shirts drinking beer on the street at one o'clock in the afternoon yelling at random passers-by.

Thank you for your interest in spending quality time with me.

Regretfully yours,
Hollar

1 comment:

kathy g said...

Could it be that the beer-drinking had a causal effect on the t-shirt fit?